People ask me all of the time if I have had any “Bridezillas”? I tell them “No, but I’ve had Momzillas!”. Too many, unfortunately.
Unless your mother has passed away or you are completely estranged, your mother and your mother-in-law play a big, big role in your wedding. Whether you like it or not. Mom plays an even bigger role if she is paying for any part of your wedding. My mom used to tell me that one of the facts of life is: “You pay–you say”, meaning whomever is paying is the person in control. This gets sticky when you and mom have very different opinions of what elegant is!
One of the roles I play as a coordinator is assessing the relationship that my couples have with their mothers. If it is a good relationship, I suggest that they hand over certain projects to mom to take care of (welcome baskets, bathroom baskets, programs) to make her feel included. If the relationship is strained, I do my best to keep mom calm, happy, and as far away as possible.
I had a mother of the bride once that was a HANDFUL. Thankfully, I knew this well ahead of time (I had been warned by the bride as well as a few different vendors!) and so I brought on an intern for the day whose job was just to check on mom. As in every 20-30 minutes. It worked! Mom was happy and felt important and included on everything. My bride was happy also because mom was attended to and therefore didn’t cause drama.
I love getting couples who have wonderful mothers–it takes away so much unnecessary stress!
On the topic of “your momma”, enjoy the trailer for the Jennifer Lopez movie “Monster-In-Law”